What is it?  Is it legal?  What to do if this happens to you!

The term ‘stealthing’ began as a slang term to describe the act of secretly removing a condom during sex without the partner’s consent.  Non-consensual removal of the condom has been reported in the LGBTQ+ community since 2014.  1 in 3 Australian women and 1 in 5 Australian men who have sex with men have experienced stealthing. 

Stealthing is an act of sexual assault that negates sexual consent, breaks trust, and leaves people feeling violated, angry, and disrespected.  As well as the emotional trauma that results from stealthing, stealthing results in unprotected sex which can lead to more significant sexual health issues for the victim, such as STIs and unwanted pregnancy.

Stealthing is illegal in many countries, including the UK, Germany, Switzerland, New Zealand, and Canada.  However, Canada has successfully prosecuted men found guilty of stealthing under the law of conditional consent.  This means that even though the sex was consensual, the conditions in which the sex was to occur, i.e., the wearing of a condom, were not consented to.  Therefore, criminal charges can be laid due to the changed consent terms.

Currently, stealthing is illegal in the ACT and Tasmania; however, in other states and territories, the legality is still undecided.  The ACT set a legal precedent in Australia by becoming the first jurisdiction to outlaw the act of stealthing.  In fact, in the ACT, it is now illegal to remove a condom during sex or to not use a condom at all in circumstances where the use of the condom was previously agreed upon. 

In Australia, Attorneys-General, Supreme Court judges, and victims are gathering for a roundtable this Thursday to listen to firsthand victims in a bid to legislate stealthing across the country.

One of the first things you should do if you feel you are a victim of stealthing is to visit a doctor as you are at risk of getting STIs or even unwanted pregnancy.  Your doctor should advise the following:

• An emergency dose of post-exposure prophylaxis (PEP), which is an antiretroviral pill that can help reduce your chances of contracting certain viral infections like HIV, where high-risk sexual encounter has occurred
• An emergency dose of the morning-after pill can help reduce the risk of an unplanned or unwanted pregnancy
• A comprehensive STI test panel is done once incubation periods for STI have passed

If you want to take legal action, filing a police report is recommended.  There may not be any current legal protection in your state for those that have been stealthed, but by filing the report, it is at least reported.

Consider speaking with a therapist.  Stealthing is a distressing experience leaving most victims feeling violated.  Talking to a professional about how you are feeling and how to cope with these feelings may be beneficial.

Last but not least, do not trust this person sexually again.  This person broke your trust and your consent regarding using a condom.  He secretly removed this condom during intercourse with you without your permission.  This is never okay and is not consensual.

Stealthing is never okay.